Piarco International Airport Notes - 27 May 2007

When you leave through Piarco International Airport in Trinidad, after you pass through Duty Free and are about to enter the gates, there's an old fashioned roller type advertisement on the top left that tells you the things that you can't bring into the country. When you're leaving. It's a bit late for that, isn't it? Here's a hint: There isn't one that's located where people come in.

And then there's the security to the gates. A swarm of security, numbering no less than 7, greets a traveller when entering the gates - and during all of the fun of pulling out one's laptop and assuring no metal is on you so that you can minimize contact with these people, they find reasons to make contact with you. Let's face it. Security at airports, as well as some airports dress them up, are still... not fun. Unattractive. But you have to deal with it, so you do. In this instance, I'd removed all metal from my person aside from some pins that would take a surgeon to take out. I pass through the imaginary doorway that security revolves around.

No beep. No surprise for me. But that simply wasn't enough for an enthusiastic wand wielding woman. "Are your pockets empty?"

"Yes, aside from my wallet."

"Take out your wallet!"

"OK", taking out the wallet and holding it away from my body.

I get a pat down which, under different circumstances, might have been fun. Nothing, which I knew. She seemed disappointed. In my out loud voice - my mistake - I said, "I don't understand why I needed to take out my wallet."

"Allyuh hear dat? He doh know why he have to take he wallet out!"

No, I really didn't. For one, it didn't set off the metal detector. In fact, I did not set off the metal detector. And the amusing part? The wand wielding woman... never used her wand. She patted me down by hand. No wand. Why?

When you give someone some power, they go nuts.

And then they found the lighter in my laptop bag. Oops. It was like a conquistadore who saw a Native American with gold - they all started whooping and shouting. Another woman with rubber gloves held her hand out for it. So I gave it to her.

What sad little lives that they lead for a lighter to cause such excitement. The nations that instituted that rule already repealed it. In the United States, you're allowed to have a lighter when you get on an airplane now. Trinidad and Tobago didn't get that memo yet (though it did have an upside, which I will post next).

Good for them, I suppose. If the government took crime as seriously as cigarette lighters, there would probably be a lot less dead people in the country.